Returning to work after Maternity Leave

For many women, returning to work after maternity leave can be a challenging and emotional experience. Conflicting feelings often arise, leaving mothers feeling torn in various directions and uncertain about how to balance everything. If you're preparing to head back to work after welcoming a baby, you may feel a sense of sadness that your precious time with your little one is coming to a close. Alternatively, you might be excited about the chance to return to the workplace, savoring a hot cup of tea and engaging in adult conversation. You could also experience guilt over making career choices that affect your family and child. More commonly, you'll likely find yourself navigating a mix of these emotions – and perhaps even more – all at once!

Navigating new logistics can be challenging enough on their own. Yet, when you add sleep deprivation and the emotional toll of being separated from your child, altering or discontinuing your breastfeeding routine, and your little one starting nursery, it’s understandable that the thought of returning to work after maternity leave can feel overwhelming for everyone involved!

Nonetheless, the responsibility of making everything run smoothly shouldn’t rest solely on your shoulders. Employers must create inclusive and supportive work environments for all employees, which includes working parents, pregnant women, and breastfeeding mothers. With the right policies in place, a woman’s transition back to the workplace after having a baby should be an exciting and supportive experience, rather than one filled with isolation and stress.

During your maternity leave (and ideally before you give birth), take a moment to thoroughly review your contract and any relevant workplace policies. This will help you understand the support available upon your return and clarify your entitlements during and after your maternity leave.

Regardless of your feelings about going back to work, it will likely take some time to adapt to the new routines, demands, and logistics of balancing work and family life. To help you feel more confident about your return to work after maternity leave, I have gathered the following tips to ensure your transition is as seamless as possible.

KIT Days

Keep in Touch (KIT) days offer an excellent opportunity to remain connected during your maternity leave and help you avoid feeling disconnected once you return. Consider reserving some of these days for the end of your leave, ensuring that the discussions you engage in are pertinent to your upcoming work responsibilities.

If KIT days aren't available at your workplace, aim to stay connected through informal interactions. Join team lunches or farewell parties, or arrange to meet a colleague for coffee to catch up on everything you've missed.

Focus on the positives

Even though you might be feeling anxious about leaving your little one or concerned about your performance at work after a sleepless night, there are undoubtedly many benefits to going back to work. Enjoy that warm cup of tea, relish the privacy of using the toilet without an audience, and enjoy having adult conversations. When things feel a bit overwhelming, try to concentrate on the positive aspects that returning to work will offer.

Introduce your child to nursery gradually 

If your child is beginning at a new nursery or with a childminder when you head back to work, avoid making their first day coincide with your return. They will need time to adjust and settle in, and it's likely that there will be tears—both theirs and yours, and probably some snuffly noses too.

Most childcare settings provide a gradual introduction, gradually increasing to full days over the course of a week or two. Aim to arrange this transition in the weeks leading up to your return, as it will help minimise stress and overwhelm on your first day back.

Practice Runs for the Win 

Prior to your first day back at work, take the opportunity to do a practice run. Set your alarm, take a shower, get dressed in your work attire, and drop your child off at their childcare facility. Follow your usual commute (maybe treat yourself to a coffee along the way), arrive at work, then turn around at the entrance and head back home.

This exercise will not only help you assess how much extra time you’ll need in the morning when preparing with a little one, but it will also make your actual first day back feel significantly less daunting.

Return mid week if you can

Don't overlook how fatigued you may feel during the initial days and weeks of returning to work. If possible, try a mid-week start date! This approach allows you to avoid diving into a full week right away, making it more manageable for both you and your little one. Even better, consider starting back on a Friday, so you only need to face one day before enjoying the weekend!

Know your rights on breastfeeding

If you are still breastfeeding when your maternity leave ends, there's no need to stop just because you're returning to work. It's important to notify your employer if you plan to express milk or breastfeed on the job, as they will need to conduct a risk assessment to identify any potential hazards.

Employers are legally obligated to provide a space for mothers who need to lie down and rest while breastfeeding. Best practice guidelines suggest that employers should also offer a clean, comfortable room with a lockable door (not a restroom) for expressing milk or feeding, along with a clean refrigerator for storing breastmilk.

If you feel uneasy about pumping or nursing at work, consider discussing flexible working arrangements. This option could allow you to go home to express milk when necessary or to meet your baby for nursing.

Think about what you want – and ask for it 

Before returning to work, have a conversation with your employer about what adjustments are feasible for you as a returning parent. Discuss how they can assist in ensuring a smooth and successful transition.

• Do you prefer flexible working hours?

• Is there a specific time each day when you need to leave?

• Are you interested in being considered for certain opportunities?

Be clear and realistic about your needs, and don't hesitate to voice them. If your employer appears unsupportive or unaware, they may need further training on the challenges faced by working parents.

Boundaries 

It's equally important to set clear boundaries with your colleagues so they understand your new working style. If you need to leave promptly at 5 PM, ensure that your coworkers are aware and don’t ask you to do something 5 minutes before you are getting ready to leave.

If attending team drinks on Friday evenings is no longer feasible, consider proposing alternative options like lunch outings or working breakfasts. This way, you can still enjoy the social aspects of work while preserving valuable family time.

Look after yourself & Ditch the Guilt

Working parents face a significant risk of burnout if they neglect their own self-care. Even when juggling the demands of work and home feels overwhelming, it's essential to carve out time for a coffee date with friends, engage in exercise, and enjoy some relaxation to protect your mental well-being.

While it's challenging to escape "mum guilt," it's important to recognise that it won't serve you well. Rest assured, your children will not suffer psychologically simply because you have a job. In fact, studies indicate that daughters of working mothers are more likely to excel in their own careers compared to those with stay-at-home parents. Similarly, sons of working mothers tend to engage in more caregiving activities than those whose mothers do not participate in paid employment.

You have already invested so much in your child's life, and you deserve to find a work life balance while nurturing your family. Remember, happy mums lead to happy kids. So, try to release the guilt and understand that all your efforts ultimately benefit your little one.